Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Tuesday's Blues...


I think I should take my down and out mood and put it into music or song or something.
"I got me the Tuesday blues
and the world seems upside down.(insert bluesy guitar solo)
I got me the Tuesday blues
and my mouth is but a frown.(more bluesy guitarness)
Now I'm telling these Tuesday Blues
Take a hike an' leave without a sound..."
I need to start working out and I know this will help my mood. Tonight I am going for a long walk...spring those endorphins into action.
I keep dreaming about my dad. So I wake up in the morning missing him so much. "Trying not to think about him" isn't really helpful. I try not to think about him,but I don't know how to control my dreams. Lately I'm not even relying on faith or anything. Instead I find myself questioning my faith. I'm not angry with God,but I think annoyed with all the man-made aspects of Church and faith. Sometimes I think people over analyze every thing. I'm probably one of those people right now!
Josey is 9 years old today. He opened his presents last night. I cannot believe how fast time has gone by. 9 years ago today I gave birth to a boy that had serious health problems. He had a paralyzed arm, lung problems and a major infection. Today I am a mother to a healthy nine year old boy that has beaten all the odds and continually shows us what is important in life. I think this is something worth celebrating!I know if my dad could speak to me he would say, "quit crying over me...go and have fun with your family!" I'm trying Dad. I guess one day at a time.
I'm going to count my blessings and focus on some positivity today. I am surrounded by happiness and laughter.
Here's 5 things I am thankful for:
~healthy children....sometimes they may be a little too loud,but I'd rather have a noisey house full of laughter, than an empty lonely home.
~My husband. He makes me laugh, cries with me, wraps his arms around me, puts up with my erratic moods, loves me, likes me, annoys me....he's just the best!
~Purdy's Dark Chocolate. Mmmmm....very good to soothe sadness.
~Merlot: A bite of chocolate followed by a glass of red wine....scrumptious delight!!! Gives an instant smile to my face!!
~Christmas. I am not in the holiday spirit but I know that once we put up the decorations my mood will change! I love this holiday season. It was my dad's fave holiday,but I know we can celebrate it and include my dad's memory while celebrating.
Have a great day!
~Jenny

6 comments:

Pen said...

Thinking of you and understand where you're coming from. The pain and emptiness will ease with time. I am a believer that when things Dad would say come back to me it really is a message from him, that he is close. I believe that your Dad is with you too and sending you little messages. *listen to your heart*

xo Pen

Roxrocks said...

Big hugs to you Jenny. I have the blues today too. The "I can't taste or smell anything snotty old bluuu-uuuues!"

Gwen said...

** thinking of you **

Happy birthday to Josey! I like hearing his story, it's beautiful.

sarah said...

i am sorry you are missing your dad. I miss my dad greatly too. we lost him in may due to a heart attack. there is not a day that goes by that i dont ache for him. I understand. Though he was not my bio dad he taught me what dads were. Hugs to you...

Tanya said...

Anytime you need to talk...or just sit...or even cry...I am here!

Happy Birthday Jonas! I hope you have an awesome day!!!

Anonymous said...

Jenny you make me smile.

Michelle

 
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