Wednesday, January 31, 2007

You Know You're From Kitimat When...

Just to clarify I'm not posting this to diss my hometown...I thought it was pretty funny and oh so true...
You know you’re from Kitimat when…
-You’re disgusted with people who don’t use Alcan brand foil in their homes.
-In addition to learning French in school, you know some Portuguese words. Mostly bad ones. You may have even picked up a little Haisla.
-You know exactly what to do when a bear approaches you in the forest. You also know the difference between your standard black bear and a grizzly, and act accordingly.
-The smell of Eurocan is permanently grafted into your memory.
-If you go on a blind date, you’re gonna know him or her anyway.
-If you don’t know them, someone else will tell you their entire life story.
-You know who the Luso ladies are.
-The Ice Demons are local celebrities.
-The only place you can go “at night” is the Keg, Robin’s or Esso.
-You’ve gone on the Alcan tour at least 3 times.
You also have enough ingot keychains to last a lifetime.
-When visitors come from out of town, you either take them fishing or go to the hot springs.
-People you don’t know walk up to you and seem to know everything about your life. -Apparently they know your mom. Or your grandma.
-There’s fine dining to be had at the golf course.
-Forest Ave. Need I say more?
-Inevitably, no matter where you go in the world for a vacation, you’ll run into someone from Kitimat.
-You’ve known your best friend since you were 5.
-Besides your regular vehicle, you have a truck exclusively for driving the back roads.
-You get road rage when you hit all 3 red lights in town.
-You insist that Kitimat is better than Terrace, and that Terrace gets most of its money from Alcan anyway.
-There are more liquor stores than convenience stores.
-20 years from now, people will still remember the things you did when you were young and stupid.
-You have an uncle named Tony.
-You remember the original giant spruce, and look with disgust at how small the new one is.
-Your claim to fame is the time you made it to Terrace in 17 minutes without getting caught or dying on airport hill.
-You can actually live on minimum wage here.
-Unless you move away, chances are you already know the person you’re going to marry.
-You laugh at TV footage of Vancouverites who can’t drive in 2 inches of snow.
-You’ve walked to or from Cablecar.
-Everything has eternal consequences. For example, if you have a one-night stand, you’re gonna see that person around town for the rest of your life.
-You remember when the deli belonged to Doris, and it was in the mall.
Going to Prince George is a big, exciting trip.
-When you get married, the whole town expects to be invited and those who aren’t get offended. -But if you invite the whole town, people figure you’re greedy and want lots of gifts.
-When you go to “the beach”, it’s actually rocks and ice-cold water(and belongs to Alcan). With a wharf to the left.
-You have the same job for 25 years (or have problems getting a great job because lucrative openings only appear when someone retires).
-The myth that God uses rain to punish Kitimat because the girls take off their clothes when the sun comes out, seems perfectly believable.
-TLC doesn’t mean Tender Loving Care, it means Total Lawn Care
-You’ve been featured in an Alman comic.
-It takes less than a minute to scan the mall for your friends.
-You know that Riverlodge is not a lodge on the riverbank, and that Strawberry Meadows is not meadows of strawberries (you wish!).
-You insist that you’ll leave and never come back, but when you go you miss your family and friends, the closeness to nature and the cheap rent. So you come back to raise your kids in a safe place, realizing that you’ve become just like your mother!
-You proudly state that your town has the largest aluminum snowflake in the world (how many other towns exhibit aluminum snowflakes?).
-You or your children only go to school 4 days a week. And that’s perfectly normal.
-You remember the days when we had The Bay, Jeans North, A&W…and you remember when people from Terrace used to shop in Kitimat.
-You learned how to drive on the dyke road. You have fun telling people that you learned how to drive on the dyke.
-You go to Terrace or Rupert to find “fresh meat” for dating.
-There’s been a picture of you in the Sentinel at some point in your life.
-You associate Canada Day with delicious multicultural food. (Are you trying to tell me Canada Day isn’t about kabobs and bifanas!?)
-Every major event of your life recorded in photographs, has the view point as a backdrop.
-Certain things are just facts of life. Like Tuesday cheap nights at the theatre and icecream at Tony’s.
-You get excited when you see someone from Kitimat in Vancouver.
-The town waits with anticipation for the day Dairy Queen opens again.
-The mayor is your lawyer.

11 comments:

Joy said...

This sounds like a very cool place!

Christy said...

This is the best post!

I am definatly from Kitimat!

When we were on our honeymoon in Vegas we saw a couple from Kitimat! So it's true what they say that you will always see someone from Kitimat when you are out of town!

And I also remember Doris's cafe being in the mall and they made the best mini pizza's!

Annie said...

Too funny...and true!! I'll have to copy and email this one!

Anonymous said...

Hi all: I moved away in at 18 years of age in 1982. I sure miss the memories....

Tom Archer

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Catriona said...

am from Kitimat and can attest to and relate to about 95% of this. LOL

I moved away 13 years ago now and haven't celebrated a Canada Day since... its just not the same in city. I miss all the food, used to stoke up on my Samosa there.

And, Doris's Deli was the hang out especially on Pizza Thursdays! Best Pizza and sandwiches ever.

Great memories, the town sure has changed since those day!

Colleen Doyle said...

I too moved away many years ago but used to plan my annual visits to see family around Canada Day so I could hit those food booths at Riverlodge!.....and god forbid any of my "city" friends call Alcan foil "tin foil"....I think if you went through your childhood and adolescence in Kitimat you were very lucky...this was such a carefree place where everyone watched out for everyone else's kids.....it really was a "village" in every sense of the word

Anonymous said...

I spent my adolescent years in Kitimat. I moved away 11 years ago now. I too remember 98% of the things mentioned here. It truly was an experience I will never forget. I haven't been back but have always wanted to return for a visit. I had no idea DQ was closed! I have many, many fond memories of Kitimat. Thank you for this post. It made me reminice

bkmanary said...

Wow, this is sooo true! Hello to Colleen Doyle! Grad 80! Your comments are right on the mark, it was a carefree time to grow up in Kitimat!
It will always be Alcan foil! And Doris's was the best deli ever!
Karen Doering Manary

Anonymous said...

A lot has changed since this was written - Alcan is now Rio Tinto; Eurocan and its smell is long gone. DQ is open again, Robin's is gone, but Tim Hortons is in town. I don't think Esso is open through the night anymore...

Angela B said...

After trick or treating you and your family went downtown to watch the fireworks.
If you refer to The Pink Elephant people know you're talking about the old hospital.
And...bear claws are a donut.

Wow...so many years ago...

 
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