Friday, April 20, 2007

Mary Poppins I'm Not

Night shifts are always tiring for me. It seems like I see Scott for such a short time and then I'm dealing with the kids, the household...wah wah, poor me...I have a situation that is causing me stress and I don't handle stress well. Scott worked two Overtimes this week so it has been extra trying. (For all my single mom girls are amazing to manage it all on your own!!)
Last night I got Gavin into bed and then I was putting the groceries away and he kept calling down to me. I just ignored him. Finally after a few minutes he came stomping downstairs,
"Mommy?"he said...
"WHATTTTTTTT?"I yelled.(oopsie, don't report me to Dr. Phil)
"You forgot to sing twinkle, twinkle wittle star to me."he said sadly.
Right then I felt like Mrs. Horrible. I went upstairs and tucked him into bed and we sang twinkle twinkle little star. (the regular version and then the MamaRap version)
Then I came downstairs and vowed I'd never be so short with my children.
Tonight I was sweeping the floor and Gavin came upstairs for the umpteenth time. Every five minutes he was wanting something.(he had a sore thumb, his knee hurt"could I carry him downstairs?")
Finally I had enough.
"Mommy!"he said.
"Gavin enough..."I said in a stern and angry voice.
"Mommy, I wuv you."He said.
"I love you too Gavin." I said with feelings of major guilt.
Seriously I ain't no Mary F@#ken Poppins.
So this is my post of wallowing in self pity. I need to find some patience somewhere.


Chunks said...

Jenny, you have to realize that sometimes, it is okay to yell at your kids. You don't have to be the perfect mom, it's all just a grand illusion anyway.

Now, don't go off half-cocked like Alec Baldwin or anything, but cut yourself some slack girl! :)

joni said...

Jenny i didn't know you secretly wanted to be Alec Baldwin..hahaha
Yeah dido on Chunks...big breath...mary popkins would scare most kids..haha well mine wouldn't like her..she sings on key.

Gwen said...

There's no such thing as perfect mothers, just really good actresses.

Nin said...

I'm totally with you, I do that all the time.
My little girl sprained her ankle on Sunday morning, and all day I basically told her to suck it up and stop crying about it (here I thought she was being the regular drama queen!). Anyways, Sunday evening rolled around and she was still complaining about it, I looked at it and it was the size of an egg!!! I took her to the doctor and she had a sprained ankle, she shouldn't have been walking on it at all! I felt so awful, I cried and cried, my sweetness kept saying I forgive you mom, it's ok, and I'm like no it's not! Anyways, my point're not alone lol!

Devo said...

I think it's important for our kids to see that we are human and we are imperfect and we can apologize when we need to but don't have to if our frustration is well placed. You are only one person and you do your best every day, just like the rest of us. Some days my best is better than other days. And some days my kids need a stern voice. Be kind to yourself, Chunks is right. It is an illusion, that old 50's story we were fed by TV and movies. Devo

Lucy said...

Jenny, think of it this way, being at home as a fulltime mom is a bigger job than anything and you do it with class gurl! Plus you are allowed to have your moments, how else are we supposed to keep the future therapists employed, if we dont give our children anything to talk about later?lol.

Janelle said...

been there...done that...wishing i could stop. but it's just such a knee-jerk reaction when they've been bugging you for a while. Kamryn's new thing is "why MOmmy?" and i can get pretty sick of that pretty quickly. every Mom does it, every Mom regrets it, but ever kid gets over it because they know how much they are loved, as long as we keep telling them that as well.
but i sure would love to hear the mamarap version of Twinkle Twinkle sometime!

Crystal said...

I'm with need to video the Mama Rap version of Twinkle twinkle and post it for us all to hear.....and yeah...Mary Poppins is an give yourself a break....your a great mother!

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